Monday, January 5, 2009

Bathroom Wars

Our apartment has a bath and a half. This is very convenient when the main bath is occupied. This morning, since the house hunk was hogging the main bath, I elected to utilize the half bath instead of waiting however long it was going to take the house hunk to finish. After completing my business I flushed, of course, and then heard that dreadful sound that everyone has heard at least once... the toilet NOT flushing. The water kept rising... so I fetched the plunger from the other bathroom--which was now empty--of course!

Back in the powder room, I wielded the plunger until the water went down. Then just to make sure that the toilet was in operating order, I flushed it again. Bad decision. This time, no matter what I did, the water just kept on rising.

At this point, I hollered for the house hunk.

Now on the weekends, the house hunk plays a computer game and when he's playing, he employs selective deafness. So, when I hollered for help, yelling for him to bring some towels, he ignored me!

I bellowed again. Louder. Bring towels quick!

He ignored me! Water was pouring over the edge, pooling on the floor!

I screeched a little louder! Finally he meandered out of the bedroom to see what my problem was, muttering under his breath, carrying one towel!

When he saw the scope of the problem, he told me to get out of the way, stomped into the tiny room and proceeded to plunge the heck out of that toilet. Unfortunately, there wasn't much water left in the toilet when he finished because it was all over the bathroom. Walls. Floor. Door. And the tiny vestibule where our front door is located.

And no towels. I ran to the linen closet and carted armloads of towels to the powder room and started tossing them down to soak up the water that was now almost an inch deep on the floor. At this point, if he had walked away, things might have been fine.

But noooooo. He had to start telling me that the mess was my fault. How was that? I didn't splash toilet water all over the walls and stuff!

Twenty towels later, most of the water was under control. The house hunk loftily informed me that he had to get back to his game.

And something snapped.

I reminded him that the towels would all have to be taken to the laundromat. Not his problem.

The walls, door, floor, etc. would need to be cleaned and disinfected. Not his problem.

The synopsis for my newly contracted book would have to be revised and okayed by my editor. Not his problem.

Huh. Something was gonna be his problem!

After the battle, I went to the laundromat. He cleaned the bathroom, the kitchen, all the dishes, and carried out the trash.

Next time I'll wait for the main bathroom to be available.



  1. ah yes, selective'd think they'd eventually learn it only gets them in deeper trouble.

  2. Ahhhh JEEZ. What a mess! And somehow this was all YOUR FAULT???? MEN!

  3. Ouch! That's a mess.

    You deserve something really good after that. Definitely a treat of some kind.

  4. I went to Borders and while I was there I thought I would see if they had your books listed. Sure enough you were in their computer. They had one book listed that they must have had but they had sold it. They had a couple of used books for sale.

  5. Heh. That must mean I'm a "real" author! Cool!