I grew up in the era when the expectation was that you finished whatever you began, whether it was the dishes or a marriage. Walking away wasn't ever an option. You just kept at it until the job was done. So I'm having a hard time admitting that I might have bitten off more than I can chew--or swallow. What to do? I really don't like to leave things unfinished.
On the other hand...
I worked for many years in a job where the expectations were impossible. And when I left that job, I determined that I would never go back to that stressful lifestyle. So it's sheer stupidity if I do it to myself. I suspect that I will have to make a couple of changes and set aside a plan or two or three. I wish that didn't make me feel like I'd failed. After all, these are MY expectations and I can choose to change them, much like I chose to have New Years goals instead of resolutions. Life is basically how we look at it.
Possibly the most difficult part of restructuring is deciding what to keep and what to toss. I'm a keeper of everything. "Someday I might need it..." Well, not today. It's about clearing the decks for those things I truly want/need to do. The rest must go. Time is passing and once gone I can never get it back.
Priorities are a bitch to set, aren't they? Oh, some are simple. Family, spouse, income, outgo, those things are sort of set in stone, right? But after that, things are a tad foggier. Doing the dishes every day? Vacuuming every day? Getting up every day? Decisions, decision. What to do? Tea or coffee? Bikinis or grannies? Get dressed and stay in the jammies?
Exciting and difficult to keep re-inventing myself after forty, fifty,... You would think that I would eventually settle down. Eventually pick something to be. I'm nearly grown up, after all. Shouldn't I know what I want to be when I grow up? Apparently not.
But I'm working on it.
I have a scavenger hunt all month long on my webpage at http://www.annycook.com/ so check out the contest box for rules and clues.
What could you spend an eternity doing? What is your passion? Your hunger? Your deepest desire? Each day beginning February 5 and running through February 14 one of the ten authors will complete the line, "My darling I could spend eternity…" on either their blog or website. Collect all ten answers and e-mail them to firstname.lastname@example.org with Eternally Yours in the subject line to win some hot, romantic books. There will be three lucky Valentine winners.
The prizes –1st prize--5 books
2nd prize--3 books
3rd prize--2 books
Entries must be in by February 16 at midnight EST. All books and prize winners will be drawn randomly.
Sandra Cox Silverhills
Mona Risk To Love a Hero
Brynn Paulin Tribute For the Goddess
Bronwyn Green Mystic Circle
Cindy Spencer Pape Stone and Earth
N.J. Walters Seduction of Shamus O’Rourke
Elyssa Edwards Mating Stone
Amarinda Jones Shades of Gray
Kelly Kirch Time for Love
Anny Cook HoneysuckleCheck out Amarinda's blog where she's being contentious all week at http://www.amarindajones.blogspot.com/ and then pop over to Kelly's blog where she's reciting poetry at http://www.kkirch.blogspot.com/ Blessings on your day!