Monday, March 15, 2010

Monday, Monday...

Rain on the roof. Gray, gray day. And I can't sleep so I'm up, at my desk mulling about what to write today.

In the last few weeks I've received several solicitations for charities. Not from strangers, mind you. No, these have all been from friends and relatives. Now, if I heard from these folks on a regular basis--you know, the occasional phone call or e-mail--perhaps I could understand their reasons for asking me for money. Maybe.

But I never hear from these particular people except when they want money for their particular charities. And it seems to me that personal appeals such as these smack of a tad of blackmail, if you will. "You're my friend (or family), therefore I know I can count on your support for my cause."

Well, no. When was the last time you communicated with me in a personal fashion. Do you know anything about me? Do you even know if I'm employed, homeless, terminally ill or supporting seventeen refugees?

When was the last time I asked you for money for my pet charity?

Please understand. There are hundreds or thousands of causes out there that are worthy. Every person has to determine a) which of those causes they feel comfortable supporting, and b) if they are capable of supporting them without depriving their own family.

A very long time ago, the house hunk and I chose specific charities to support. If we have extra funds, we donate more to the charities of our choice. If everyone did the same, no charity or cause would ever have to have a telethon or a concert or any other money raising scheme.

In the meantime, to those individuals who fire off those personal appeals for money... try getting to know me before you ask for my hard earned dollars.



  1. There's not enough money to support all the wonderful charities that need it.

    Like you, we have charities we support, like the local food bank. Then there are those events that crop up, like Haiti relief.

    Other than that, if it's not someone I talk to on a regular basis, I usually say no. You can't do it all, no matter how much you might want to.

  2. I had an acquaintance years ago. We both had small children. I would invite her over, from time to time, so that our children could play together. She never invited me over to her house. But, whatever. It was really about my daughter having a play date. Not so much a social event for me. She had adopted two children and wanted to adopt a third. Admirable. I hadn't heard from her in quite awhile. One day she called and invited me to meet her for coffee. Just us. No kids. I thought, "That's nice." and said yes. She seemed sort of tense, coiled up like a spring. There were a few preliminary, courtesy questions and then she hinted at wanting a very large donation from me to help her adopt a third child. She knew that I understood what she was asking even though she hadn't said it straight out. She knew my non-response was a denial. I never heard another word from her after that.