Cooking Bacon Naked

The thing about retirement is you never have to get dressed--unless you're going out. When you're retired, no one comes over to see you. They're all working. Or shopping. Or doing other stuff that requires clothing... like gardening or mowing the lawn.

So, back to the bacon. Cooking naked has certain hazards. You can't get too close to the stove (or oven). Things tend to splatter and spit when you're cooking. Come to think on it, using a mixer can be hazardous, too. Cake batter, in particular, has a tendency to spray in a chaotic fashion if you're not careful. The up side (if you're naked) is the body is easy to clean. The downside is hot splatters can be painful.

On most folks the stove top is right at the level with their belly. This is good because the important stuff below the belly is safe. However. If you're a lady, there could be difficulties for the top. Which is why... I leave all that naked cooking up to the hunk. It's a win-win situation.