Tuesday, September 18, 2007

Oh, the disasters in life!

I broke a fingernail today. I know, I know, you had no idea that I was that kind of woman. But there it is. I confess that I do have one girlie vanity. Until last year, I never was able to grow my fingernails. They were little stubs that were paper thin and broke if you looked at them sideways.

Suddenly last year they began to grow. They're sturdy and grow loooong and don't break. No, they're not fake nails. I had those a couple of times. Yuck. I think they finally started growing because my thyroid meds are finally right.

Anyway, the fingernail broke and that meant I had to cut all the rest of them down to size because there's nothing sillier looking than nine long fingernails and one short stubby one. I look silly enough without having uneven nails.

Of course, the short nails are a real problem. I'll be able to type now so there's no excuse for not finishing that book I'm writing. Nope. No excuses there. Incoming, Helen!

Since I'm doing research on acorns the long nails were much handier for picking the acorn meat out of the shell. I'll have to find something to pry it out now. Difficulties, difficulties. Life's just full of difficulties.

My cat and dog will miss my nails for a while as they loved it when I used them to scratch that spot they can't reach that runs down the middle of their backs. I suppose I'll have to find their ratty old comb and use that until the nails grow back out.

On the other hand, now would be a good time to work on those beading projects I had planned as it's nearly impossible to pick up tiny beads when you have long fingernails. I suppose its just a matter of timing. Short nails--do short nail projects. Long nails--do long nail projects.

Broken nails are like bad haircuts. Both nails and hair will grow again. Unlike other things in life, this is a disaster that is easily dealt with. And if it's the worst thing I have to face, then life is good.


Amarinda left us with...“You cannot change fate. You must mate with the chosen one by this Thursday afternoon at 12:17pm.” Beatrice wanted to slap the willful woman.

“No, I have decided to get my nails done that day.” Nails verses sex? Nails win. “Anyway why do I have to sex with this chosen one to stop the sun colliding with the planet? Can’t someone else do it?”

So of course I had to work with that...

Beatrice briefly considered wresting the pistol from Fiona’s hand and using it on her. It would give her such a sense of accomplishment and satisfaction. No, that wasn’t the solution. Tapping her hairy chin thoughtfully, Beatrice considered the difficulties for a moment, then nodded her head decisively. There was one surefire plan of action. Sometimes these situations required tough love.

She grabbed Fiona by one pointed ear and twisted.


“If you refuse to behave responsibly, then I’ll send you to Mystic Valley. You know what that means,” Beatrice growled.

“No!” Fiona gasped. “I don’t want to be turned blue. And babies! I can’t stand babies! Anything but that!”

“So you will give your sworn word to go to the Oracle’s temple immediately?” Beatrice demanded.

“Sworn word?” Fiona hedged. Breaking her sworn word was a death sentence. Still… Beatrice was only asking her to go to the temple. What she did once she arrived was another matter.

“Sworn word,” Beatrice reiterated grimly. Fiona might think she would escape once she carried out her promise, but that wasn’t going to happen. No, all they needed to do was get her into the temple. After that, the aphrodisia ferns would ensure her cooperation.

“Fine. I give you my sworn word that I will go to the temple immediately.”
* * * * *

Back in the studio, the hamsters milled in confusion. Zoltan ran up to the top of the cage and squeaked, “Quiet!”

Rafe and Shade, twitched their noses. “It’s all your fault, Emmeline! If you had just allowed Fiona to keep you a were-bunny, everything would have been fine!”

What will Kelly do? Will Fiona get to the temple in time? Will someone turn the hamsters back into people? Will Emmeline consent to be a were-bunny? Tune in at Kelly's blog at www.kkirch.blogspot.com to find out. And check out Amarinda's blog tomorrow at www.amarindajones.blogspot.com to see what she's up to. Don't forget that tomorrow is Talk Like a Pirate Day!


  1. what is this fascination Kelly has with bunnies(maybe the boiler episode) and hamsters? Andfd you are right - a broken nail is nothing - however running out of carrots or chocolate is requires conselling

  2. did you like how I added extra letters to 'and' and made it 'andfd'...hmmm...sounds like a character name to me....

  3. This just keeps getting better and better:)

  4. Made it through the were-bunnies perhaps and even the hamsters....just you wait and see. Esp because you two wrote me into a corner. Either she screws someone in the temple or the planet explodes. I'm not hitting restart but I sure as hell will make your job complicated. Cause what are friends for?

  5. Okay, Anny, so how did you get your nails to grow, having stubbies myself this inquiring mind wants to know. grin.